..oh the moodiness..

Yesterday I had my 2nd Lupron Depot shot. Ouch! The nurse really knows how to jab that long needle right into my muscle in my booty! My DH does them so much better. They require me to come in which is so lame when my DH knows how to do them...he gave me these same kind of shots except they were progesterone for 2 weeks and they still say I have to come in. So irritating. So 2 down and 1 more to go on June 23. We are getting closer and closer to July and I'm more excited than ever.

Overall, the side effects have been mild. Nothing too out of control. Well I've noticed over the past week or so that my mood has changed. I'm irritated easily and my DH really gets on my nerves. I'm fine when I'm at work, and then as soon as I get home I'm so pissy and just want to be left alone. All I feel like doing is screaming or yelling at someone. It's pretty intense. I've had to walk away from a few situations to calm down and so far it's working. My walks definitely help. People just in general are irritating me. I'm already an emotional person and my emotions are out of control right now. I'm thinking it's probably because of the Lupron. I can't find any other reason why. Everything in my life is going well and there is no real reason for me to feel so down. I'm coping with the moodiness pretty well and DH seems to be ok with it. He keeps asking me "are you in a mood" and I say no because I don't want to start anything. I hate when he asks this..his Mom asks me the same thing and it's so annoying to me. No need to ask this stupid question in my opinion. All it does is put me in more of a mood. My body has had a month to process the Lupron and they say the 2nd-3rd month gets better so we'll see.

I was scheduled to have my 2nd cryo surgery tomorrow to remove precancerous cells from my cervix, but I had to reschedule for next Wednesday at noon. I'm nervous again because it's was really uncomfortable last time and it hurt. I'm hoping this time is better. I'm one of those individuals who did NOT get this from HPV thank the Lord. I just have them and we don't know why. The only thing that really bothers me about the procedure, is the more times you have it, the harder it is for your cervix to dilate. Most woman end up having c-sections because their cervix won't dilate past 1-2. This is ok with me. As much as I want to have the experience of child birth, I know what it feels like to be cut open and what the recovery is like so I know I can handle it. Maybe I'll be one of the lucky ones and actually fully dilate!

Other than that, I'm doing pretty good. I'm super hungry lately which is driving me crazy! I sit at my desk for 8 hours and I'll I want to do is snack and snack on bad stuff! I feel good and that is what matters.

I just want August to be here. I want to know if we are having our baby or not! I pray this is our time! Please Lord!

Hope everyone is doing well!

Lauren